Fur ever friends

I could not help noticing that my old friend and his charming new wife were on the TV last night complaining about the fur trade again. The "McItsokyoucangetoffyourknees" are a dedicated pair of do gooders that never cease to amaze with their constant campaigning on matters that those of us who have a mortgage to pay either couldn't give a stuff about or are too busy keeping the wolves from the door to get involved.

I must say, that I, like so many of my friends from the Dog and Ferret, am horrified at the prospect of soft furry animals being used as adornment for the so called bodies of half-starved bony apologies for women that pass themselves off as stylish and sell the rights to their continuous weddings and hard luck stories to "Ok" and "Hello" magazines.

Having conducted a straw poll at the bar yesterday evening I can report that most of us would prefer to see a few buxom well fed wenches, such as Marylyn Monroe or Mrs Thatcher wearing a smile and very little else than a walking skeleton wrapped in leopard skin pouting moodily as she glides down a catwalk contemplating her next mug of cocoa. (Which i believe is their recreational drug of choice.)

So I'm right behind Sir Macca and his bird, good luck to them, they have my support, which is ironic when you consider that I am currently renovating one of his! Of course though he may deny it I can exclusively reveal that he has been a client ever since the late sixties when I had to knock up that ridiculous bushy beard for the "Let it Be" album. Since then we have enjoyed a very close hate, hate relationship as I have helped him through the ups and downs of his career. From the highs of "Ebony and Ivory" to the crazed depravity of "The Frog Chorus", McNasty has been somewhere providing soothing balm, hair nets and surgical support stockings for McCarthy. In fact in the word of one of the songs that i gave to him before he became famous it seems like only "yesterday", (although it was probably never), that he came personally to the emporium for a fresh supply of the almost orange dye that I normally use on my 'not quite ginger but so obvious it's dyed' range. He's also got me working on a custom truss for his upcoming 'Zimmers over America' tour....It's such a shame though that he spoiled his good name with those communist witch hunts all those years ago.....